Falling

Ok, so nothing absolutely awesome has really happened today. Not that I expected it, it just didn't happen. I'm insanely tired from dance last night, my whole body just aches, and I've been really depressed anyway. You see, I think my boyfriend is on the verge of breaking up with me.....for 7 months we've gone strong but now I think he's trying to be rid of me. I'm past crying...I mean, I know I'll cry if/when it happens, but I already did my "What if he..." cry and so now I'm just depressed about the whole situation, knowing that I can't do a thing to make him change his mind. Everything seems so pointless, hopeless, dreary and miserable. Sure, I've been putting on a mask for everyone out there at school and stuff, it may seem as if I'm fine. But really I feel as if I'm falling deep into a chasm, falling inevitably into a misty abiss, not quite sure of what lies ahead (or beneath me) but knowing that whatever it is, I shall have to face it, bad or worse. And I love him...oh God, how I do. But there is one thing I have learned from all this horror and relationship hell.

You can't make someone love you back....