A path to moving on

i need to get over him. need to. and i think i pry can..

i heard from reliable sources it's over between him and syd. he told her, evidently, that nothing would happen, and it could only be just friends. this could be false, but from the person i heard it from, i'm gonna believe it.

HOWEVER i'm not taking this as a go sign. yeah, he flirts. he's always done that. he's BEEN doing that for the past 2 months now. and i can't deny that he has some sort of feelings for me. but not hardcore full-blown feelings. i guess.

he's so cute...and funny..and sweet......but i can't let any of that seemingly perfection get into my way of realizing that we're not gonna be together. and we can't.

you know, today i was sitting in choir, and she talked to me. sydney. we were joking and laughing, and it was kinda nice. who knows, maybe she ACTED that way, and secretly talks about me behind my back. but still. it was nice for a lil while to not worry about what she was saying about me.

and i dunno....it's not like i can't have any other guys. like this one dude..who i think might like me. i've had my suspicions for awhile......and he's cute, i've totally flirted with him before. funny. smart. i dunno...i'm sick of boys. they cause so much drama in my life. sad thing is, half the time i can stand boys more than i can girls and their catty ways. *sigh*

oh well...i'll just go to college, 3 hours away, and perhaps meet THE ALL-AROUND PERFECT MAN and we'll end up together and it'll be amazing. maybe.

until then...i guess i have some living to do.